Manner RE-Invention with Intention!

Start on January 1

While New Year resolutions are driven by positive qualities of hope and optimism, they can also be related to a belief that the year brings a “fresh slate” to reinvent yourself.  Did you know that only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s resolutions…? So we like to use the term Re-invention instead. The terms mean to invent again or anew, vs resolving on a course of action.

So beside the popular re-inventions like losing weight or saving more money, we think January is a good time to re-invent your professional image and manners.

 

Intention is a good word too… Dr. Wayne Dyer’s bestselling books, describe intention as a key ingredient in making any change possible and positive.

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So Mother, May I suggests reinventing your Professionality through earnest intention. Understanding that the result here will positively impact your professional and personal lives in 2016!

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Some studies say 13 days some say 21, and studies have suggested up to 60 days depending on the change to be made. The time varies based on the person and the need to succeed. So we suggest mapping, physically mapping, out you professional improvements and prioritize, tackling the low hanging fruit first. Prioritizing is the first step to help jump start this Re-invention process.

The other things to keep in mind would be the following:

  • Keep it simple
  • Make it tangible
  • Keep believing you can do it!
  • Communicate your intentions/goals to some like a trusted friend or mentor. If you physically say it out loud, you become subconsciously accountable
  • Then practice, practice ,practice

What are the most important professional habits you can reinvent to get the best results at work?

We narrowed the list into some broad attributes that resonate in almost all professions. First on our habit trail would be:

  • Timeliness –Being on time is a critical component to your professional success. This goes not only for showing up to meetings and appointments but also in the timeliness of projects and responsibilities. Tardiness “costs U.S. businesses more than $3 billion each year in lost productivity. The effect on the bottom line of the average business is significant
  • Preparedness –Being late exhibits that you’re not prepared and again will give off an air to others that their time doesn’t matter. Unacceptable and very fixable!
    • Give a realistic time frame for completing all the tasks on your list. If they involve collaboration, make sure you place and communicate deadlines and allow for a little more time.
    • Always have paper and a pen on-hand. Do not show up empty handed to a meeting. We suggest to have a small notepad and pen at the ready. This gives off the impression that you are ready for the task at hand.
    • As for being prepared for a networking function or last minute meetings/event, use search engines like Google or Bing, to have at least a few factoids in your mental pocket to communicate at the appropriate moment.
  • Active Listening – We always say that you have 2 ears and one mouth and you should try to use them in that ratio. Listening with authentic intent creates a more productive exchange of information, and offers the speaker or your boss the impression that you, the listener, are more trustworthy and competent.
  • Reinvent your “digital” impression – Be an active and diligent participant in managing it! You control your destiny as it relates to your social media impression. Review all platforms on a bi-weekly basis and untag pictures and block or unfriend people who are posting inappropriate things. Most HR executives will check your social media before hiring a candidate…70% of candidates never even get to the interview phase based on what is found on social media.

You can end the year by making the right impression with people you count on…

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Please let us know your New Year’s RE-inventions and let us know the difference it is making for you at work.

Happy New Year!

Lisa and Demetria

Co-founders- Mother, May I

Who is Affected by Your Ongoing Tardiness?

 

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So….when is fashionably late a good thing?   Well from someone who claims to have been born 10 minutes late and who typically starts a conversation with “Sorry I’m late”, I may not be the right person to ask. But studies and fact based research emphatically says “No” to the notion that being late is an acceptable behavior. Not only will this problem put you in a perpetual state of chaos and haste, but you may convey a message to friends and coworkers that you do not value their time.    If this description sounds accurate, take note as we begin to explore being tardy…a sign of disrespect!

With the onslaught of cell phones, it has given people some sense of false security that notifying others of your perpetual tardiness is “ok”.

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Well it is “ok” if you are detained because of an accident on the highway or a delayed flight…but many feel just by making the effort to call makes lateness ok. Well just because we can doesn’t mean that we should…and what it could mean, is that you don’t get “the job” or “the client”.

So what is the cause?

A study of 225 people with San Francisco State University, giving personality tests to determine what causes chronic lateness. As it turned out, “the late scored higher in several areas, including anxiety and distractibility, while placing somewhat below the timely in the areas of self-esteem and self-discipline.” So being perpetually late ends up becoming a cycle of anxiety and low self-esteem.

And how about the Millennials in the workplace… 60 Minutes and  Forbes Magazine  have done articles and segments and have determined, “They (millennials) have climbed Mount Everest. They’ve been down to Machu Picchu to help excavate it. But they’ve never punched a time clock. They have no idea what it’s like to actually be in an office at nine o’clock, with people handing them work,” “74% of them require a work/life balance”.

So where does punctuality fit in? And what is the effect?

  • Employees who choose to be late are showing blatant disrespect for the manager or administration. This can have damaging effects on the rest of the team.
  • Habitually late person is not only illustrating his own dissatisfaction with his workplace, but also affects the work habits and morale of others… If one or two people are consistently late for no reason other than they seem to think it’s not a problem, then the rest of the staff may start to have a problem.
  • If you are late you end up paying for it…literally! According to Diana DeLonzor, the author of  “Never be Late Again: 7 Cures for the Punctually Challenged,”  tardiness “costs U.S. businesses more than $3 billion each year in lost productivity. The effect on the bottom line of the average business is significant: An employee who is late 10 minutes each day has, by the end of the year, taken the equivalent of a week’s paid vacation.”

ClockBut, interestingly, 44% of the hiring managers surveyed, via Career Builder, said they didn’t care if their employees were late as long as the work was completed on time and with good quality.

The bottom line…

If you have a flexible boss, who values your worth as an employee, then 5 minutes late here and there may not be an issue. It is when it effects other’s ability to get their work done is where employers have to draw the line.

Respectfully… Mother, May I  says make being early, work for you.  By being 10-15 minutes early to a business event or meeting can make a big difference in what you get out of it. It shows to savvy observers that you are prepared, and you may get a chance to make an impression on the key note speaker or the president of the company.

So now a days… I set my clocks fast, set reminders in my phone and use Starbucks locations as my early holding spot before a meeting. These work for me…

Tell us what types of things do you do to get yourself to be on time?

 

Thanks for reading,

Lisa and Demetria

Co-Founders Mother, May I – Etiquette Experts

Building Better Relationships…Are You Strong Enough?

 

strong-relationshipSo… in this digital age it seems like people take more value in how many “Facebook Friends” they have versus the actual friends they interact with on a regular basis. This holds true in business as well…many people hide behind their computer or electronic devices vs actually conducting a phone or face to face interaction.

We have all heard the definition for IQ (Intelligence Quotient) right? It is a standard that measures a person’s intelligence.

Well let’s consider an RQ… Relationship Quotient. A way to score how a person builds solid relationships at home at work at school and in their community. Would you score above or below curve on that test?

Since this is January and our theme is “Building” rather than “Resolving”, here are some measurable tips to become stronger in your relationships!

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  1. Communicate! Communication in any relationship is key, and how the communication is delivered can be equally as important. Be sure your communication method best serves the message. For instance you rarely want to leave really personal news on a voicemail or even more horrifying, in a text. Divorce via text message… Really? http://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2013/06/18/katy-perry-talks-about-brand-and-mayer-in-vogue/2433855/
  2. Be authentic! Trust can be severed or questioned in a minute if you are not honest and upfront. Most people want to know the truth even if you don’t think they can handle the truth. Like A Few Good Men
  3. Listen! You have 2 ears and one mouth. Try using them in that ratio. Active listening, with eye contact and sincerity goes a long way to improving and building relationships. It is a fact that an empathetic listener is more likely to be trusted and respected. Plus it is just good manners. “Being a poor listener is associated with poorer social and emotional sensitivity.” according to a study from Psychology Today. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fulfillment-any-age/201203/11-ways-active-listening-can-help-your-relationships

So this January as you set goals for 2015, make an effort to improve that RQ…and see where it takes you!

Mother, May I wants to help you build stronger relationships in 2015.

Call or send us an email  – we will be happy to listen!

Cheers,   Lisa & Demetria

Co-founders Mother, May I

May I Improve Myself with 3 Simple Behavior Changes?

Angel and DevilOf course! You can make a few tweaks (not Tweets) to yourself and that might be all you need to create a better 2015 for yourself and those around you. Building a Better Year by Bettering Your Behavior!

In a culture where technological advances are often used to help us connect with others, what may occur is connecting ourselves more deeply to our own narcissism. Take some time to keep your distance from that “selfie”.

Take some old-fashioned MMI advice – How people look at you may be a catalyst for making a difference in their lives. Read Mother, May I’s Making the Right Impression page to learn more.

Take a snapshot of yourself from a distance – Become aware of your mind-body vulnerabilities.

Changing your behavior to make a better impression may be a daunting thought…but, it is not impossible. If you follow some simple Mother, May I codes of conduct, you will develop the skills to leave a better impression. Resolve that you WILL make a better impression on others in 2015.

  1. Act Positive! Use the right body-language to let others know that you are feeling good. Learn about the right body language at MMI’s Lunch-N-Learn training sessions…Details will be posted soon.
  2. Use the right words. The proper word choice is important when you want to send the right impression.
  3. Reduce your stress by developing a “care for others” regiment. Throughout your day, practice simple, yet powerful acts of kindness.

Mother, May I wants to help you help yourself feel better in 2015.  Practicing good manners will get you moving in the right direction!

Need Help? Call-text-email us- because we can help.  BTW, my New Years resolution is to help 3 people a week.

What is yours?  Share with us one of your resolutions that you feel will create a better world.

 

Happy New Year!

Demetria and Lisa

Co-founders Mother, May I