So it is actually kind of ironic that I would get this weeks topic to write about…see the thing is, I don’t really believe in “Valentine’s Day”. No, I am not bah hum bug to love…the contrary actually, just feel that Valentine’s Day is a commercialized holiday in order to sell more price hiked flowers or make jewelry stores more profit. I have had, like most of us, my share of not so great relationships, but if you can change your approach to a more mannerly one, odds are things will improve. So I am going to offer some helpful hints on how you can be more mannerly in relationships…all year round, vs. just one day of the year!
- Communicate and Listen to each other… Mother, May I teaches the benefits of active listening skills, which has been proven to improve relationships at home and at work. Feeling like you are being heard is important making you feel respected.
- Live respectfully… No matter how frustrated you are, it’s always better to be respectful to your spouse, partner, friend, co-worker, than not. Make it your charge to act respectfully, and ask that you be similarly treated. This means watching your tone of voice, speaking about your own needs rather than other’s shortcomings, and remembering to find the positives in each other. Living respectfully also means respecting yourself!
- Rethink “I’ve got to…” It’s amazing how easy it is to get caught up in an “I’ve got to (fill in the blank)” mentality. Yet a really honest assessment suggests that many “got to’s” are actually “choose to’s.” Be accountable with your needs and the needs of your partner and focus on the “choose to’s”. Look at the bright side! A change in attitude can compliment your relationships in general.
- Embrace the differences… you’ve heard the old adage that opposites attract, but do they stay together? Well it depends on how we handle each other’s differences. Civility is the key! Accept your differences and allow those to strengthen your relationship. Don’t view your differences as problems, but view them as an opportunity for you to be with someone who will bring you out of your comfort zone.
- Keep smiling and laughing… Don’t be misled, happy relationships have serious moments too. Even arguing is part of a healthy relationship, but happy couples get each other’s sense of humor. Couples who keep things lighthearted when they don’t need to be serious show that they still value the traits that brought them together in the first place.
Whether going on your first date or in a long time relationship, a proper code of conduct in relationships will help manage the process.
Pick one mannerly behavior you want to improve in your relationship building style…Let us know it changes things!
Lisa and Demetria
Co-founders Mother, May I